Updates & it's time for Amazon reviews!

Junkie,

We're off to a rousing start with bookstore sales, and we hit #2 in horror on Amazon.com (behind some dude named "Stephen King," or something like that). This is a solid showing, considering that so many of you kicked in the doors of your local bookstores, grabbed the latte-sipping clerks by the collars, and shouted into their shocked little faces "give me Sigler, or give me death!" Considering that most bookstore clerks are not certified death-dealers, this strategy worked well in most cases. Junkie Bob in Tallahasee, real sorry the clerk popped a cap, we'll pour some on the curb for ya ...

And now, FDO™ News Bits.

AMAZON.COM:
Two words: "Sick 'em." Now is the time to go and leave your Amazon.com review. Reviews help sell books, so you're doing your part for the glory of the Future Dark Overlord™. The douchebag reviews are starting to trickle in as well, so if you click "No" on "Was this review helpful to you" that drags them down. If you think the reviews are totally out of line, click "Report This." Enough "reports" and the review gets pulled.

SALES RESULTS:
I will have more information on total sales on Wednesday, April 9. The publisher has told me they will have some info, but not a definitive count. We might know if we chart NY Times, we might not.

BOOK TOUR UPDATE:
LA was awesome! We had about 50 people, the bookstore sold 42 copies of INFECTED, everyone was happy. We all went to the world-famous Rainbow Room afterwards and rocked out to 80s hair metal.

SEATTLE: April 4 at Barnes & Noble downtown
SAN FRANCISCO: April 5 at Borderlands Books
NEW YORK: April 9 at Borders Columbus Circle
HOUSTON: April 11 at Murder by the Book.

WHAT MOVIES INFLUENCED THE NOVEL "INFECTED?" CHECK IT OUT AT AMCTV.COM:
http://blogs.amctv.com/monsterfest/2008/04/horror-movie-influences.php

ASSASSINATION ATTEMPT:
Yes, an attempt was made on the life of Pope Siglericus XXX on March 31, the day before INFECTED came out. Agents of actress Julie Andrews poisoned some almond rocha candies that showed up as "a gift" at a pre-launch party. I spent all of April 1 in the Future Dark Bathroom, hurling more frequently than a drying-out heroin addict.

But FDO, you say, Julie Andrews? Yes, that Nancy-pants do-gooder that stared in THE SOUND OF MUSIC. That Julie Andrews. Seems her book came out on April 1, and since she stands for all that is good and pure and kind she wants to block all that is evil and corrupted and mean ... namely, me. She is the Luke Skywalker to my Darth Vader, and I will not stand for it! Don't believe me? Take a look at how she strategically positioned her book to surround mine:

http://flickr.com/photos/scottsigler/2382097994/

And her weapon of choice:
http://flickr.com/photos/scottsigler/2382098620/

We are plotting our revenge against this shining light of goodness. We will not allow such a good-doer to exist on this realm. Prepare yourself, Julie Andrews, you should have killed me when you had the chance ...