Scott, This was great. Intense, action packed, funny. I like all the elements, it made for a great ride. You're right, the manipulation of Sly is pure evil genius! It took me by surprise! As for moving things around, you could likely move the under-the-bay portioon of the book to a second, leaving more room for further development of Marie as a character (through historical flashback) or what have you. I'd love to hear more about Aggie too.
The end stretched out a bit and I agree that while Brian didn't close the deal on Rex and 1st born himself, he did kick major arse for his first outting as a Saviour. Speaking of, I would love to know what revenge Jebadiah was referring to (even in a biref aside before 1st Born caps him). I think it's crappy how he dies too. He was a complete kick-ass nightmare to these people and that snake skinned scum bag's blood causes him to loose his balance in the end. THERE IS NO JUSTICE for that old dood! First Brian plants a knife in his gut, then 1st Born! NO JUSTICE!
Great story, CAN'T wait for at least ONE of the 5 sequels you're dangling out there you book tease!
David