Let's nitpick THE WALKING DEAD biology

Posted: Oct 23, 2012

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The Walking Dead Season 3 Since no matter what this post actually says, someone is going to bitch and say I'm ripping on the show, let me land a few pre-emptive strikes so there can be no confusion about my opinion of THE WALKING DEAD, Season 3.
• The first episode was goddamn awesome
• The second episode was even more goddamn awesome

I thought the show really dragged in Season 2 with the endless whining and ridiculous character decisions of Lori, the endless Days of our Lives drama that made the show THE LET'S TALK ABOUT OUR FEELINGS DEAD, and the concept that people are just going to let their kid "go out and play like kids do" when there's a freakin' zombie apocalypse going on. I'm sure there's more of that to come in Season 3, but so far the first two episodes were off-the-hook good (if I may bust out an 80s phrase, kids).

I'm under deadline (and shouldn't even be writing this), so I don't have time to blog-chase the answers. Besides: I'd rather hear what the Junkies think, because you are all rather smart.

Now, with all of that praise out of the way, I have some questions (read also: let's nitpick the tiniest details). I really only do this with amazing shows that are so close to "perfect" it bugs me they couldn't find a way to tie up those last few little points.

SPOILERS BELOW! DANGER, WILL ROBINSON!

BIOLOGY / CONTINUITY NITPICKING

1. What's the deal with biting and scratching?
Can someone help me out with this? I'm lost on the continuity.
• They all have the virus
• If they die, the virus "activates"
• So then why does a bite or a scratch make them zombies again?

2. If a bite or scratch makes you a zombie, why doesn't fluid contact to eyes, nose, mouth and existing cuts?
These people are the Gallagher of the horror world -- you need a raincoat to sit in the front row, for Christ's sakes. There is so much zombie fluid hitting faces the show might as well star and undead Jenna Jameson. Infected zombie blood hits characters in the eyes, the mouth, goes up their nose and splashes on any cuts they might have (and considering they have a rough-and-tumble life without a lot of Snoopy Band-Aids™, so there should be dozens of abrasions that allow blood-to-blood contact).

Daryl and my other brother Daryl 3. Daryl carries contaminated arrows in his freakin' mouth, for freak's sake
He does. I've seen it. You've seen it. An arrow that just went through a zombie brain? He puts it in his mouth to carry it around! If the disease is spread by bite (saliva) or by scratch (no idea, blood?), and he puts those materials into his pie-taster, wouldn't that be a slam-dunk case of ZTD (zombie transmitted disease)?

4. Your blood circulates really fast -- wouldn't you have to amputate instantly?
My wife is a nurse. One of the things nurses do is inject "contrast" into a patient's bloodstream so they can see how the heart is pumping. They also admister meds intravenously. She says that when you put something into the bloodstream, it hits the heart almost immediately. So when Hershel's leg is bitten (awesome FX, by the way), and it takes Rick a good five minutes of screen time to play Whack-a-Mole with his shin, wouldn't the viral vector (which is carried by blood, isn't it?) already be well into his bloodstream?

This one is bugging me more than the rest. It takes about one minute for blood to make the round trip from leaving your heart to returning to it. Everyone has the "virus." If they die, they turn. If they get bit, they turn. That means there's a hibernating virus (in healthy people) and an active "I-will-fuck-your-mother virus" in the zombies. The active virus spreads via bite or scratch, when that wound draws the victim's blood. So, how would chopping the leg off stop a virus if that virus was blood-borne?

PLOT NITPICKING:

5. Fences are your friends. Don't leave your friends.
In Episode #1, they are standing behind a perfectly good fence. The zombies come to them, and they shove a pipe in their eye (an actual pipe, that wasn't another Jenna Jameson reference, honest). So, why would they leave the safety of that fence to "take the yard?" All they have to do is stand there, the zombies walk up to the fence, the zombies get stabbed in the face. Do this until there are no more zombies. Did anyone else have a problem with this?

Once they go into the prison to clear the cell block, I get that -- fog of war, things are confusing, there's zombies trying to eat your face.

6. What am I missing? Why is Rick still pissed at Lori?
Let me break down my logic here. I'll use my high school friend Scott Christian as an example. I've known him for 25 years now, so I'm pretty damn sure we know what kind of guy he is:
- Say there is a freakin' zombie apocalypse ...
- Say Christian thinks I am dead, because like 60% of the world is dead ...
- Say he then protects my wife and my only child ...
- Also, say my wife thinks I am dead ...
- Say Christian and my wife have known each other for 20+ years and are buddies in their own right ...
- Say Christian and my wife start bumping uglies ...
- Did I mention they both think I'm dead? ...
- Say Christian gets my wife in a family way ...
- Am I really going to feel all betrayed about that?
- Especially after I killed Christian with a knife, showing the whole world who is boss?
- And there's a freakin zombie apocalypse going on?
- Pretty sure I'll live and let live at this point. What am I missing? Does this make sense to any of you, or would also let bygones be bygones
- (Caveat: Lori is the most annoying character in the history of television -- she's a non-funny version of Seinfeld's Neuman:yes, that annoying).

7. Zombies "playing dead" (added because of a comment by ELCas, I forgot about this one)
The stakes are rather high if you make a mistake, you know that putting a pipe through their freakin' heads will take them out, but you see a zombie sitting there like a Haight Street pan-handler and you don't crush that melon? You just walk on by, thinking "hey, he's not moving, so all good?" The scene where Hershel gets bitten left me shaking my head a little bit. A) Anyone have a theory as to why they ignore zombies that have a whole head? and B) Are some zombies smart enough to use strategy?

BRING IT, JUNKIES:
Fill a brotha in on what I'm missing here. I'm thoroughly entertained and very happy with the Red Bull version of THE WALKING DEAD. I can't wait for Episode #3.

29 Comments

stormwalker4

On Oct 25, 2012 @ 10:42AM

I agree with you on every point except number 6. I don't think Rick is mad at Lori for her relationship with Dhane. They dealt with that last season. He didn't blame either of them for that. (although, his best buddy Shane did lock leave him in a hospital unprotected and unconscious with a building full of walkers and tell Lori that he was dead. Not that he left him in a room to die, but that's beside the point.) I believe he is upset with Lori for trying to turn him against Shane at every turn last season. Always pointing out how Shane was trying to snake him. Then when the deed was done after it all came to a head, she turns on him as if he had did something wrong. She was then completely unsupportive and acted as if it was something that Rick had been trying to do all along and that she had no part in it. As if it wasn't for the protection of the group. Recall how she responded at the end of the final episode last season. She pulled away from him. It seems that through the winter, Rick has gained some perspective and is rightfully upset with Lori for her part in what he considers to be the most difficult and distasteful thing he has had to do for this group and how none of them including Lori seemed to understand. I also think he is projecting a bit of his own self hatred for killing his friend but he can't kill himself or even really self destruct because the group will suffer in his absence. He resents them all a bit for that because he would much rather have had his friend by his side than be the sole leader of this group with all of the responsibility that comes with the role. In all of this time though, I think Lori has realized just how ridiculous her actions were and wants to make amends but Rick wants no part of it.

stormwalker

Frauliman

On Oct 26, 2012 @ 9:24AM

I wish the show was called 'The Sprinting, Semi-Intelligent Dead'. I agree with Mr Sigler. The way they have this show 'imagineered', I'm pretty sure one man armed with a fence, a pipe, and a little bit of patience could rid the entire world of the zombie apocolypse after a year or so. These super slow, super stupid zombies don't scare me in the slightest.

Wesleyan_Hendrix

On Oct 26, 2012 @ 1:38PM

In explaining this bite, scratch, fluid, zombie thing; this only goes for this show. If you are iin a world full of dead bodies walking around i could not even fathom the different types of bad bacterias and microbes that are flying around in the world at large. That saidd my wife is also a nurse and we have had these conversations at length and have come to the point of if you are bitten or scratched you instently open yourself up to these bateria, or microbes, or even microphages that are swirling around and since your body is probably over taxed with the way you eat and live; it is safe to say your immune system is not quite up to par. There for, you die from the infection from the wound and then the actual virus reanimates the body with really the sole purpose to spread said virus. Something a lot of virus actually do. If they had someone who knew the ins and outs of infections they could probably save someone from dying who had been bitten, but they would need a very steriale inviroment and hard core anti-biotics just to give them a chance. Also, in regards to your fences are friends comment; you are absolutely corect although after almost a year of malnutrition and constantly on the run it is safe to assume that the human brain is not quit processing these events correctly; not to mention the shear emotional trauma that they have indored. The grief-resistance or stress scale for most people dicates how much our own bodies and minds are affected by things like grief and stress. Most people should not make any decisions for 3 months after a loved one has died; that is one of the highest on the scale. Other things such as moving, changing jobs, and getting married are also major things on this scale. So, these individuals worlds have been destroyed, the whole world. i can not even imagine what kind of toll that would have on the human psychy but in fathoming a guess; I would say that their judgement would be permentaly damaged and would never view the dangers, that we all clearly see as well as the appropriate course of action, as accuratly as they appear.

Life...Dreams...Hope...Where did they come from?

And where are the headed?

These things..............I am going to DESTROY!

scottsigler

On Oct 26, 2012 @ 9:46PM

In reply to:

Wesleyan_Hendrix

Wesley, that's some of the best apologetics evah! I'd never considered the basic answer that, in effect: "They are like, really-really-really tired and super bummed 'cause all these bitches they love died and stuff, so they rushing into shitty decisions."

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