LOST: They F**K NO! you in the drive-through
Scott
As anyone who has the misfortune of following me on Twitter knows, I watch LOST. For 5 years (we were a year behind getting started), the Evil Queen™ and I would watch every episode. In short, the producers have tried to build up this mythology where they "knew all along where the show was going," which is just absurd. I won't get into it here, but if you watched the show, you might enjoy this brilliant retrospective on the questions LOST didn't answer.
At this point, all I want for my 120+ hour time investment is for the producers to come out and say "yeah, we were making this shit up as we went, and we didn't know where we were going with it, but it sure was fun, wasn't it?" If they said that, I'd be thrilled. But they don't say that. Now we must suffer the endless LOST Apologists who think the ambiguity and plot holes and inconsistencies and unanswered questions are all done on purpose, so that people can theorize over the "true meaning" for years to come.
The true meaning? the producers made a butt-load of money. They made the careers of several actors. They entertained millions. Isn't that good enough? Now stop with all this "genius" crap and FESS UP! You kept throwing out questions and teasers to keep people watching, and you had no idea what the answers were the whole time.
But, I won't get that. So for now, I must be satisfied with the video, above, that shows just how out-of-control the writing was.
Fuck it, Junkies -- I'm switching to metaphysical/supernatural fiction, where there are no real rules and you don't have to actually answer the plot constructs you ask your fans to explore. It worked for Battlestar Galactica (BSG), it worked for LOST, now it's gonna work for me.
SHOULD YOU WATCH LOST?
I've been getting this question a lot. Here's the answer: if you watched BSG and loved the ending, LOST will make you jizz in your pants. If you didn't like the end of BSG, then LOST will make you want to find someone who likes it and stick a fork in their fucking eye. Any questions?
14 Comments
I loved LOST
But for me, making the whole thing a dog's dream just defied explanation.
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Ethereal Undead Brain Zombie, Geisha of DØØM, Two-handed Twacker, A.E. Pusher, Champion Catfighter, Dark Goddess of Perversity, Vinyl Vixen, Gutter Mistress & Co-Founder of Gutter Sistren
Luckily for me...
I hated the first couple of episodes of Lost and never watched another one. But as a huge fan of Twin Peaks and The X-Files...I feel your pain.
~Writer, activist, book nerd, boozehound, gamer, slapper, sandgroper, accident waiting to happen~
don't get me started on
don't get me started on the X-files!!! I want my 2012 episode!!!!!!! and I'll whine and scream, and hop on pop, and other things untill i get what I want!!! that last movie was BS and worthless to the story!!! AARGHH!!!!!
Molly McButters is my Homeboy!
Molly McButters is my Homeboy!
Gonna jump on the soapbox for a sec here
The sad, disgusting truth is that television entertainment is no longer any kind of art, it no longer has anything to do with good storytelling. The TV studios have become throughly corrupted by the same thing that has wrapped it's greasy tentacles around... well, pretty much everything else in the world. Demon, thy name be "The pursuit of fast profits." Producers don't really care about making quality entertainment anymore. They don't care about telling coherent stories. Hell, they don't even care about building actual physical sets. The only thing they do seem to care about is maximizing profits and minimizing costs, and how do they do this? By padding their lineups with "reality" shows and sitcoms (which are dirt-cheap to make), and by lowering production values. They cut costs by using green-screens instead of building physical sets, and by hiring hack writers who will work on the cheap (and it shows in the quality of their writing). They cancel quality casted shows (i.e. Kings, Life, Flash Forward, etc) and replace them with less expensive things like wrestling and spin-offs of other "reality" shows (SyFy, I'm looking at you!).
You see, the producers don't care why you tune in, only that you do, and they know that a majority of the average TV viewers out there will settle for mind-numbing distraction over quality entertainment. As a random example, take SyFy's Stargate Universe. If you check the reviews just on Hulu alone, you can see that the dominating opinion of the show is that it sucks sweaty donkey balls, yet people keep tuning in each week either to see just how bad and stupid it's going to get or because the show is like a flaming semi-truck t-boning a bus full of children... you know it's going to be horrible but you just can't tear your eyes away. But the producers don't give a damn about your motivations for watching, as long as their spreadsheets come out with the right numbers to justify what they're charging for advertising. The "greed is good" Reganomics crowd who were in their 20s back in the 1980s are the cats who are running things now, and they're running things straight into the frakking ground in their pursuit of ever-increasing profits.
I guess they think that big bank accounts and summer houses in The Hamptons will fill the empty places where their souls are supposed to be.
**Conjunction Junction, what's your function? No seriously, I slept through grammar class, so I have no idea what you do.**
Pretty much the whole reason the TV in my house...
A) Doesn't have cable, satellite or anything else connected to it
B) Only gets turned on maybe once a month and only then to watch a movie
and C) will continue to remain that way!
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Captain of the Touchback and Proud member of the Gutter Sistren
"But I'm always dreaming. Even when I'm awake."
The Pure Essence of Randomness, Captain of the Touchback, and Proud member of the Gutter Sistren
See what they do???
I wonder if these producers understand the long-term psychological damage they're causing??!!
The X-Files non-movie gutted me, but not nearly as much as the decimation of Twin Peaks. "Hurry up and reveal who killed Laura, already! No, I DON'T care if that will destroy a million sub-plots and leave multiple questions unanswered. I'm losing ratings, which means I'm losing money! Fix it!"
Not to mention INTENTIONALLY ending the second season with a massive cliffhanger, then deciding not to make a third season.... GRRRRR!
~Writer, activist, book nerd, boozehound, gamer, slapper, sandgroper, accident waiting to happen~
Ha! "Autistic Kid with a Snowglobed" again!
never watched a single episode but have been following the uproar over the effing of the aye they called the series finale.
I am quite evil, so I just have to sit back and laugh.
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the trick to staying sane is to just out-crazy the world
CBBC Corrupter, Official Translator of Pope Siglericus XXX, 2012 Body Maim World Champion, Siglerfest 2K12 Open Invitational Double Elimination Arm Wrestling Champion
That kinda sums up life in general
spend. fuck. die. repeat with next generation.
There's really no substance anymore; people are opting for flashy glitz over deeper impact time and time again. No more is there pride being taken in work as the bottom line is all that matters, how we got there be damned!
That's why I just tend to watch the Discovery Channel, History Channel, the Travel Channel, and all forms of cartoons these days.
Society, nay the world itself, needs about every kind of revolution one can dream up.
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the trick to staying sane is to just out-crazy the world
CBBC Corrupter, Official Translator of Pope Siglericus XXX, 2012 Body Maim World Champion, Siglerfest 2K12 Open Invitational Double Elimination Arm Wrestling Champion
Here is an article
Dude from big hollywood has an intersting take on the Lost fine
http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/aleigh/2010/05/25/no-love-lost/#more-351798
Take no prisoners. Take no ....!
Drop your socks and grab your... Copy of Where the hell have I been! Owner of the Isis Ice Storm [flickr-photo:id=4779220092,size=m] Puller of strings
I wonder
how many people actually get that reference.
**Conjunction Junction, what's your function? No seriously, I slept through grammar class, so I have no idea what you do.**
I get from up on my hilltop!
Si Vis Pocum, Para Bellum
Jayguana
I loved the show, even in its worst spastic moments.
I even liked the ending. I wanted answers like everyone else, but I enjoyed what they did with it. Its not the best ending ever, but it definitely ended in its own Lost style.
On another note, I understand people not liking the way it ended but some of the freak-outs over it seem a little to much! My favorite so far was a post on another site that simply read "Thanks JJ, your an asshole for wasting 6 years of my life! I will stab you in the dick if I ever see you". For one Im pretty sure JJ didn't show up to this guys house every week with a gun and force him to watch it, and what did his dick have to do with anything?
Si Vis Pocum, Para Bellum
Jayguana
It's subtle
but full of the lolz.
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the trick to staying sane is to just out-crazy the world
CBBC Corrupter, Official Translator of Pope Siglericus XXX, 2012 Body Maim World Champion, Siglerfest 2K12 Open Invitational Double Elimination Arm Wrestling Champion
Dude! I am so glad
I quit watching this show a couple of years ago.
Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself. – Mark Twain