Junkies, I managed my third straight day of morning running. The plan is to be up at 6am, running by 6:30am. Today, I hit snooze until 6:20am but was out on dem streets at 6:40. This week is no big deal; the goal is to just get up and go for seven straight days and run for 20-25 minutes. Next week I’ll start worrying about time and distance.
I’m not getting any younger. Smarter? Sure. Even more _sexaayy_ than before? Of course. More eeeevil? Goes without saying. But younger? Nope. I had a gym membership for the past six years and averaged 1-2 trips a month, max. Now I’m dialing back to the ancestral form of cardio: wound a prey animal, chase it for miles and miles until it drops, then finish it off. Only without the prey animal part.
This isn’t much — 30-35 minutes a day, which includes stretching. Hopefully that will make my metabolism burn a little hotter through the day (that strategy worked like gangbusters back when I wrestled in college, so there’s some evidence that it works with my body type, although the data is 20+ years old).
How about y’all, Junkies? Are you getting in any kind of basic workout? Pushups and situps? Jogging? Eating smart? If you’re in your mid- to late-thirties and forties and beyond, what are you doing to improve your health? I ask my fellow Children of the 80s: what are you doing to stave off the Grim Reaper for a few extra years?
I ask because I’d rather not see you die. Unless I’m in your will. If so, I’ll send you delivery cheese fries for lunch. Also, there might be a gun range accident at SiglerFest, so make sure your insurance premiums are paid up.
The picture is not me. But that’s what I feel like at this exact moment. Someone get the crash cart.